Every day is April Fools day at MCT. We are living in a world of fools–so isn’t that appropriate?
Albert Gosuelezstien got the shock of his life after returning home from the store when he started preparing a salad. He grabbed a tomato he bought and saw it had a nose! He jumped. It turns out that an entire truckload of genetically modified tomatoes that were delivered to a Hoboken, Oregon Safeway store had noses.
Department of health officials quarantined the store area and advised local shoppers that, “While we know of no adverse effects of eating tomatoes with noses, consumers should do so at their own risk.”
Gerald Rutreldov, a manager for Safeway said, “We apologize to anyone who was inconvenienced by the tomatoes with noses and will give a full refund to all who inadvertently bought the tomatoes. For those individuals who still wish to purchase these tomatoes
There are cultural phenomenas and inventions that come about that change the world forever. The gun, the printing press, the airplane, rock and roll, electricity and the Internet all impacted the world beyond measure. These phenomenas had huge economic reverberations. What will be the next giant phenomena that will change life forever? Could this next big thing be the economic stimulus that transforms the world to break us out of the current economic crisis? A group of intellectuals, scientists and prognosticators, including Nobel prize winners, got together and asked these exact questions. They examined things like wind power, the rebuilding of an electric rail system, an advance in solar energy technology, the viability and possibility of nuclear fusion. After several intense weeks of study they unanimously decided that the next big thing will be dwarf tossing. They made a persuasive argument in their 400 page report that the dwarf tossing phenomena will bring the world out of the economic crisis.
Dr. Elmont Chestmontville, a Harvard Sociologist, said, “A generation from now the world’s greatest dwarf tossees will be just as famous as
“It was a nightmare for law enforcement last year,” says police chief Ernie Koobouts.“We had hundreds of idiot conventioneers going around in bathing suits in freezing weather asking for directions to the swimming pool. One guy shivering his ass off told me, ‘Last year’s convention in Miami had a pool, so I thought all conventions had pools.’
“We had a cold snap last year and several idiots froze their tongues to lamp
We published an article in November, 2006: “Sprawling Factory Built In Oregon, But No One Knows What They Make, Including The Workers — Stock is way up!” We wrote about a factory that produced nothing but the company finances and business plan looked good to investors–so the stock was going up. Sound familiar? It could have been altd, “If The Manufacturing Sector Was Run Like the Financial Sector.”
Investment banks and Wall Street financiers created “wealth” and profits out of nothing. For example, they engineered derivatives— complex bets that were essentially making money off of money. This is different than investing capital based on savings from real work and production. So the house of cards has collapsed. If you are confused about what is going on imagine it is still 2006 or 2007. Here is reprint of our November 2006 article about a factory that is run like the financial industry was. Maybe now it will make sense. Maybe not.