Noses

Sexy Noses

Porno Sites That Cater To Nose Fetishists Raking In Millions

Sexy noses are driving men wild & fueling a new Internet economic boom while the rest of the economy is floundering. Pornography is a giant industry. Forty to fifty percent of all Internet traffic is devoted to pornography and there are sites featuring everything from midgets to women who pee. But with all kinds of wacky fetishes old hat people are looking for something new. The newest odd fetish to come out of the closet is noses. Nose fetish web sites, featuring sexy women’s noses, are ringing in record hit numbers. “It’s the oddest thing,” says pornographer Sammy Slisershot, “I never thought I’d be paying sexy women top dollar to leave their clothes on and take pictures of their noses. But that’s what people seem to like now. Noses!”

Emily Senbus always considered herself as a conservative, “I never even thought of doing pornography. I don’t even have very big breasts. But if all the pornographers were interested in was my nose I didn’t see anything wrong with it—especially for the money I make.”

Senbus has what nose fetishists consider an extremely sexy

nose. Slightly bigger than average, but very nicely shaped. She stars in several films where she wears a veil and strips. She massages her nose, rubs it against body parts and Eskimo kisses other women. For this she makes half a million dollars a year.

Some aren’t so happy with sexy noses being all the rage like porn star Golanda Goldbucks, “I worked for years doing all kinds of disgusting stuff. I’ve had anal sex with midgets. I’ve had men pee on me. I even risked my life and had sex with a gorilla. Now some floozies come around and make even more money than I ever did just for playing around with their noses!”

Nose fetishists can’t get enough. Web sites like sexynose.com and hotnudenose.com are getting millions of hits. Plastic surgeons are inundated with requests for nose jobs, while breast enhancement surgery is declining in popularity. “If you’re a plastic surgeon that specializes in breasts you’re hurting,” says Portland Medical College Professor, Dr. Benson Bomgets. “We’ve had several surgeons return to school to hone their nose job techniques in nose clinics.”

Feminists are outraged. Gloria Minbucket, a spokesperson for NOW said, “We are appalled at this objectification of women’s noses. We will strive to insure that all women can obtain rights and employment opportunities no matter what shape or size their nose is.”

Meanwhile men are going wild over sexy noses. “Wild And Naked Noses, vol. 1,” has sold a million copies and a Miss Nose Universe beauty pageant is in the works. A nose fetishist, who wished his name be withheld, summed it up, “Whenever I see a sleek, sexy nose with two flaming hot air nostrils and smooth chocolate skin it gets me so hot I could explode. I don’t even care if a woman is flat chested and weighs 300 pounds. If she has a sexy nose she’ll drive me crazy!”