Mad Scientist Puts Chemical In Water Supply That Will Turn Everyone In The Whole World Into Elvis Impersonators A high ranking FBI official has informed Meltingclocktimes.com that a fugitive mad
Man Follows Shampoo Directions And Dies In Shower After Lathering, Rinsing And Repeating For Weeks No one had heard from Elbert Wingducker for weeks. Finally his sister broke into his
The Internet Is A Fucking Waste of Time Is your life better than it was fifteen years ago because we have the Internet now? Think about it. Isn’t it a
Short, Bald, Fat Guy In New Jersey Controls The World Some people go on about how the oil companies control everything. Others believe the CIA, or Goldman Sachs, or Dick
Man Trying To Break World’s Record By Singing “10,000,000 Bottles Of Beer On The Wall” Shot To Death By Wife “10,000,000 bottles of beer on the wall, 10,000,000 bottles of
Jehovah Witnesses And Mormons In Major Turf Wars Over Door to Door Trafficking Both the Mormon and Jehovah Witness religions are growing and it was inevitable that the two groups
US Medical Insurance Complex Cartel To Join Forces With OPEC A consortium of American doctors, the AMA, all the major health insurance companies, and pharmaceutical conglomerates are all grouping together
Eating Tomatoes Declared Illegal Due To Trademark Infringement Edwin Tomato says his family has had the name “Tomato” for centuries and all farmers and produce dealers owe him and his
Whipped Cream Factory Explodes, Entire Town Buried Under Whipped Cream Hundreds feared dead It was a typical American town, with tract homes, a shopping mall, fast food chains, a Walmart
Perverts Molesting Vacuum Cleaners, A Growing Problem For Appliance Stores And Law Enforcement Agencies A growing problem is terrorizing appliance stores that sell vacuum cleaners and bogging down law enforcement
MCT Investigative Report: Everyone In The USA, Without Exception, Is Crazy –And that includes you reader!MCT launched a thorough investigation that probed into the media, social and political life. We
Tobacco Store Receives 10,000,000th Prince Albert In A Can Crank Call If you run a tobacco store one of the drawbacks is all the idiots who call every day and
Morgan Chase & Goldman Sachs Financiers Helping Out Unemployed By Hiring Them As Human Furniture Wall Street banking firms like Goldman Sachs are reporting record profits, thanks to back door
Special Thanksgiving Turkey Report: New Sport Craze: Live Turkey Parachuting! A new sport is sweeping the nation. Skydivers are jumping out of planes without parachutes. They are attaching themselves to
We are republishing the following because it fits the Halloween season and explains the headless elections coming up: A shocking update to Washington Irving’s “Headless Horseman!“ Headless People Terrorizing Cities
