We published an article in November, 2006: “Sprawling Factory Built In Oregon, But No One Knows What They Make, Including The Workers — Stock is way up!” We wrote about a factory that produced nothing but the company finances and business plan looked good to investors–so the stock was going up. Sound familiar? It could…
Engineer Invents Perpetual Motion Machine With Beer Cans Pollution Free Technology Will Revolutionize The World Engineer Rufus Thornburt might not be a household name yet, but Thornburt and some alternative energy innovators believe one day he will be as rich and famous as Bill Gates. Rufus Thornburt has invented an innovative but simple way of…
MCT Offers $500 To Anyone Who Invents A Device That Destroys Answering Machines Here is the situation: You call someone and a recorded answering machine voice says, “You have reached 555-1234 ….” I just dialed the fucking number so why do all you people have to let me know it again? Then the voice continues…….
This article was originally published June 13, 2006. Another MCT article explains why this didn’t work out. Walmart will instead raze the Treasury Department and build the super center there. Read about it via this link. Ground Breaking News! Tuesday, June 13, 2006! White House To Be Razed For New Super Walmart Walmart officials and…
Have you ever got a junk mail ad for a magazine? MCT advocates the death penalty for spammers and junk mailers. But if we sent a bulk advertisement out like those you used to get before the Internet got big it would be like this: Where do intelligent and inquisitive readers like yourself go to…
A new virus is sweeping the nation and thousands of people have been infected. This virus does not make people sick, but the virus makes people believe they are orthodox Jewish rabbis. Justervod Elsap was a normal guy who watched football, drank beer and worked in a hardware store in Chicago. Last Tuesday he woke…
Thieves across the nation are plaguing law enforcement officials and stealing noses. Many people look upon nose theft as comical, but it is no laughing matter to its many victims. An unfortunately typical senario beset a New York city man who wished to remain nameless. Last Monday a man broke into his apartment while he…
BUSH THROWS WILD BLOW OUT TRANSVESTITE BALL IN WHITE HOUSE Shocking Pictures! MCT Exclusive! We Were There With A Hidden Camera! President George W. Bush shocked everyone the last night of his presidency and threw a huge transvestite ball in the White House. Conservative Republicans who credit Bush for his strong moral stance are outraged….
MCT wrote about Dr. Vivold Linquensha more than a year ago. (link) Not only did he make billions in biotechnology, but Linquensha foresaw the housing collapse and shorted banks in 2008. (Linquensha likes short things) Linquensha became one of the richest men in the world. And what is Linquensha doing with his wealth now? He…
It is the most bizarre thing ever to occur in the history of humanity’s endeavors into space. Yesterday a psychedelic VW hippie van, with two long hair hippie skeletons, collided into the international space station. The hippie skeletons were outfitted with frazzled tie-dyed t-shirts and one skull had a joint in his mouth. They had…
Hoboken, Oregon Divided On Hosting Idiot Convention The Hoboken, Oregon Convention Bureau doesn’t even do good business in the summer. The town is far from anywhere. In winter when it is rainy and snowy no one comes. That is, until last year when the International Association Of Idiots decided to host its annual March convention…
Unfortunately doctors sometimes mess up. One recent medical screw up is causing a controversy. In a Hoboken, Oregon hospital surgeons mixed up a nose job patient and a sex change patient. The sex change patient ended up with a nose in-between his or her legs. The nose job patient ended up with a vagina-like creation…
College Students: You’d Be Better Off Getting Bums Off The Street To Educate You Rather Than Paying Outrageous Tuition We here at the MCT can’t understand why students aren’t rioting in the streets over the outrageous tuition costs. Some students are getting smart, quiting college and hiring winos and homeless bums for tutors who offer…
A MCT Public Service Campaign: Friends Don’t Let Friends…. Unless you’ve been in a cave for the last several years you have probably heard the phrase, “Friends don’t let friends drive drunk.” We at MCT thought if so many people are too stupid to know not to get plastered and race around in a car…
No one had heard from Elbert Wingducker for weeks. Finally his sister broke into his house and found Elbert’s skeleton in the shower with a thick lather of shampoo on his head. Hundreds of empty shampoo bottles were strewn all over the bathroom floor. Apparently Elbert Wingducker was a man who took things too literally….
